Finding most empowered woman

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This time I decided to find out empowered women. Where else they can be found easily except the place of open culture, the first love of all foreign tourists in India – Goa.

My friend and I decided to join together to a trip to Goa where she had a different work. I requested her to accompany me in exploring Goa in her break from official duty. She agreed and we decided to spend the weekend tour together.

Since my intention to finding the most empowered Indian women (that my friend didn’t know) I decided to visit a night club. We spotted a pub where couple entry was free before a certain time. All pubs in India charge a premium to single men while some are generous enough to offer such free riders to couples. Women entry is free anyway. This always gave me a feeling that these pubs give signal that men should have a prized catch in the name of a woman to gain free entry for a restricted time. Else they are not entertained.

My friend and I went in and very soon we were sitting near the bar drinking. It was early hours in the night and the pub was still not fully operational. Only a few couples and ladies were to be seen. While the entry was free and people started drinking the dance floor was still closed. We sat quietly near the bar and I have ordered for a beer and my friend ordered juice. Of course I paid for her drink as the provider gene is in my blood. I will say she was kind enough to restrict herself only a juice and not hard drinks. After all, my entry otherwise could have costed me Rs. 3000.

I was looking around for most empowered women. Women sitting at the round tables of the bar and drinking scotch or smoking hookah were all looked equally empowered. None of them were wearing full dress and the amount of skin shown was my measurement of empowerment. Well, I was trying to be a feminist there. My friend that way was very outdated. She was the only girl in the entire bar with full covered dress with a glass of juice in her hand. Quite a scene in a Goa pub really.

While I was busy spotting the most empowered woman around and I was confused with whom to choose, a girl entered in a frock that barely covered her arse.  Not to mention that the back was completely open. She entered waving to the western tunes, immediately gone to the bar, took a few Tequila shots and went on dancing near the bar. Looking at her dress and moves I was feeling that she was probably the most empowered of all, while a second woman entered and she stole my thought.

She was wearing hot pants that showed more skin that it actually covered. The top was a bunch of strings covering some important parts but baring open more. What I liked about her was she was wearing horns that was blinking, giving a feeling that she was horny. The threads of her top was dancing on her belly button and kissing other important parts in such a way as if they were inviting other guys. Most of the time she made a pout with many guys in there, was offered tequila many a times and in no time she was seen in other guys’ arms. Wow!! I felt I found the most empowered woman in Goa. She was carefree, shame free (or shameless), going all over the place and trying drinks, hookah all. All eyes were soon focused on her. My friend was quietly sitting near the bar as she watched me trying to find out someone. Obviously she was nobody among those highly empowered women.

By that time I noticed some foreign nationals had entered the pub. No one noticed them as they were quietly drinking at one corner. That group was a mix of white and black people. Not much special sight in Goa and I didn’t observe them.

The dance floor opened at 10 PM. The night became more colourful, younger at the dance bar. Everyone was trying to give their best moves to the monotonous music. That DJ was playing similar sounding music all through but people were innovative in their dancing action. My friend and I was catching fast with the tempo when I noticed some of the girls went up a raise round platform (probably made for most attention seekers in the pub) in the middle. A big cloth was hanging from the top and the girls were trying all seductive moves by holding the cloth or without it. Soon guys gathered around them and girls started falling on the guys. I was still trying to spot the most empowered woman of all.

A couple was dancing beside us. A hefty girl with a comparatively athletic guy. The girls on the platform was trying hard to be most seductive (and most empowered) while this girl next to me took the hand of the guy and put that on her huge bottom. In the blinking lights of the night club the seduction was even more as the girls battled for being most seductive and most empowered.

Very soon the music became little faster the girls dancing on the “Attention platform” dropped in the arms of different guys and the guys caught those girls really well. I felt probably those guys could try in Indian Cricket team. No wonder why the girls were good catch for them. Only thing is that I could not understand who was a catch for whom. No wonder why pubs charge a premium from guys. They get to catch the most beautiful balls in there.

By this time the huge woman dancing next to me has allowed the guy to put his hand inside her top, with their faces close by. She was clearly leading the empowerment race in the pub when the foreigner women went to the “attention platform” to dance. Now I noticed them properly.

One of them was bald headed, wearing geeky specs (thick ones). I wouldn’t have recognized her as a woman unless I noticed something that looked like her bra. The other African woman dancing with her didn’t bother about inners. Her boobs were clearly visible from all sides. They were dancing in all possible ways with the cloth and with beer bottles. Their suggestive gestures invited many. Soon I found some heavy bouncers arriving and taking their positions. Well, I understand that their job may be the most difficult one. Being not aroused and stay focused….on women who are trying seductive steps. (lol).

I looked at my sides. My friend and I was almost dancing the same way. The heavy woman and her partner gave up dancing as they became busy in some other intimate act. I was little confused about who was most empowered when I noticed the foreigner girls coming down of the podium and going out of the dance floor in a quite intimate posture. I felt almost certainly that I spotted my most empowered women for that night in them. Because they had not only come out of the clutches of patriarchy, made them free but also had broken all set parameters of gender thinking. One of them was not easily recognizable as a woman unless she showed her bra openly, the other one didn’t even endorse the patriarchal clutches of bra. They were also openly close enough to show that they had broken all barriers of sexual oppression.

My friend asked me to leave the place as she was tired. I was a game too as I spotted my most empowered woman in there.

While out of the pub, I still asked my friend what made her come out so early? She replied, “I need to work on a multi-million dollar deal tomorrow. Need to sleep early”.

Well, I didn’t tell you, my friend is an IIM graduate and working for an MNC as Assistant Director, Consulting.

After some time, while we were walking back to our respective hotels I told her, “What about going to a Bollywood Night party tomorrow?”

She looked at the rates at a nearby club. It was Rs. 2000 for a couple while a woman’s entry was free and said, “Well, I think I would like to go alone because anyways my entry is free. It doesn’t make any sense for me to pay for something that is actually free for me” (she was an empowered woman so would have paid 50% of the entry fee anyway).

I felt, women will be women no matter how empowered they really are. That is why they will remain as a prized catch for men.

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Celebrate Blogging – Humaar Style

Celebrate Blogging

Working for a social cause and adopting a style of humour and satire to make a serious social cause even create impact in the masses is very creative and difficult, too.

But probably the life wouldn’t have been so beautiful if there were no challenges. So I have adopted that style very elegantly. The main motivation behind creating this blog called Humaar.in is that bringing in a funny side of every serious social issue that is otherwise not possible in a serious blog. But it is not that every serious issue is better explained only in serious way.

Examples are aplenty. Be it marital rape or Rohtak incident or Jasleen Kaur incident, challenge in all such cases were to take up these cases in humour and project them in such a way so that the message reaches everyone clearly without creating any animosity between genders.

It is not that everyone understands the importance of humour or understand the real meaning behind each humour based articles. Understanding satire is even more difficult. So as a genre these two are probably the most difficult genres to take up for a social and serious cause. In many cases the people associated with the cause I promote has criticized me for using humour to promote their cause. They think in way such effort trivializes the importance or seriousness of the issue.

However, I have never thought that way. I feel that it is important for a writer to reach his audience in different ways. Also when there is legal complications involved not everyone understand the serious articles. The topics that involve law, statistics or scientific interpretations can not be understood by all in a serious manner. These topics just puts them off. So my effort in all such cases is to make the topic very light and present it to my audience in such a manner so that they understand and appreciate the seriousness.

My journey as a humour blogger on this website might have started only recently but I have been using humour as a style for a long time on my original serious blog. In one case when I wrote a spoof on Barkha Dutt, my readers thought of that as genuine news and they believed the same in-spite of it being mentioned at the end of the blog that it was a spoof. Many cautioned me of legal complications that even today I fail to understand.

But I didn’t want to stop bringing a different aspect to every social issue. So I wanted to continue celebrate blogging in my style and hence created this blog Humaar.in. The tagline for my blog is “Maar with Humour”. In other ways my style is to resolve social issues with humour without lessening the importance of the issue. This is my style of celebrate blogging.

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Why I am not able to marry

Ever since I have expressed my thought about how dangerous marriage is for men today, the Humaar team is behind me to publish my story. Not sure if anyone of you bother to read.

I was approximately 35 years of age, never married and was looking for a suitable match until sometime ago when I found that marriage in India is a death trap for men. You know these MRAs have blocked my mind from marriages completely.

I wanted to get married and searched for a lot of girls. Since online websites are easy way to search these girls, I enrolled myself in all possible sites in search of my soulmate.

So I started looking for girls younger to me.

But I could not finalize on non working girl as she would take lifelong alimony simply on marriage with me. I didn’t want to be a slave to anyone like that.

So I decided I will marry a working lady, but I –

Could not finalize a doctor or medical professional because she could poison me to death and snatch my property.

Could not date a lawyer or similar professional as she would always threaten to file false cases and make my life miserable.

Could not marry a business woman as all her debts would come on my shoulder without her being responsible for anything.

Could not marry a teacher, fearing she would only give lecture about characteristics of good husbands.

Could not think of dating IT professionals because she would release her job frustration on their husbands.

I kept myself far away from beauticians or similar professionals as even if their character were good they would end up spending my money for their own beauty treatments. I was also worried how beautiful they would really look without make-up, knowing fully well that recently a man had to file for divorce after he saw his wife without make-up.

When I have exhausted all my options with working women I thought I will marry a social worker. That was the time I saw a debate on TV where some social workers were having a debate on marriage law amendment bill or IRBM. All of them were divorcees and busy criminalizing their husbands and others’ husbands too in a big way. I realized that marrying a social worker would only bring disaster in my life.

Finally I thought I would marry a non working, average to simple looking girl. Then the story of Rohtak Sisters came to my notice. These girls demanded that they were molested 2000 times on roads. When I saw their interview on TV, I decided that there is no point getting false cases from simple looking non working criminal girls.

Marrying divorcees were already ruled out by my MRA mentors. So I thought I will marry a widow.

Initially, my family was not ready to accept the idea of me marrying a widow. A never married perfectly healthy man marrying a widow who had sex earlier, is probably considered to be impure and hence this objection. But I went ahead to find a match who had suffered unfortunate demise of her husband.

But then the statistics of husband suicide came to my notice and some MRAs told me that these widows actually could have murdered their husbands. Since my marriage possibility was vanishing fast, I tried to find the widow who wouldn’t have killed her husband.

I found widows mostly with a kid or two. So other than marrying an impure girl, I was now forced to consider adopting someone else’s child and agree to pay alimony for both of them for their life. Finally, I tried to look for someone who didn’t have a child but whose husband died a natural death. I met several women, one said, her husband one day died of vomiting blood and internal organ failure. Another said, her husband died of car accident, someone else said her husband has slipped off the rooftop while repairing something.

MRAs have poisoned my brain to such an extent that in every above case I found that the woman could have killed her husband with impunity. Some MRAs said, look for widows who lives with their in-laws and whose husband died in battleground.

I have found one such girl from a remote village in Bihar. Her in-laws were in fact marrying her off and she was great soul whose husband died in battleground and she gave the money received from Indian Army to her in-laws. When I visited her place I found her in-laws to be very rich and having another unmarried son. Immediately I thought that probably her in –laws wanted to reduce the share in their property so they were marrying their DIL off. After her marriage she would lose her right in their property. If they really loved their daughter-in-law, why they didn’t ask her to marry their younger son? The moment I thought of that I realized she indeed could have been a not so good girl whom the in-laws wanted to disassociate with.

Today, I am 42 years of age and running out of time to get married ever. Looks like if I embrace the best possible choice available to me now, I need to wait for false cases in an interior Bihar village.

Well, my mind is currently not working. These MRAs have really screwed my mind.

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